--------------------------Life is full of choices and if there is one thing I believe, it's that we should never have complete faith that every choice we make will be right. The only faith we should have is that we are human, fallible and prone to error. Life is about making mistakes, living with them and learning from them. I had recently been reading a number of the online journals on this site and have been moved by the sense that life still has a destiny for us. That we have a place and a meaning on this earth and Universe.
Having been newly diagnosed in the last 3 years, I haven't had the experiences that many other HIV Pozative people have gone through, but I still seem to view things with a certain optimism. Am I being naive or am I simply trying to mask an unfaced fear and an untamed demon? I would love to have answers to those questions, but like life, not everything reveals itself with such clarity. This is not just a period in our lives, it is now a part of our lives. The question is whether it will become your life or will it simply be another layer of your complicated-interesting self. I suppose it's easy to say, when your not on meds, or when your not sick, or when things seem to be going fairly well. I don't have an answer to that either. All I know is that I am here now and life has a lot to offer, as I to it. I am not just living but I am life. Life to my friends, family and to many others. I know even at the worst of times, someone else is in a darker place, and though that does not comfort me, I know that I can't waste tears and pity on myself. Hope is always there, you just gotta dig a little to find it, and hopefully I can be there for someone when they need it.
Disclaimer: These are just random cerebral thoughts, from a Random cerebral individual.